Growing Up Gay Part 3: Look at Me Now!

I grew up hating prejudice. I used to ran away from it when I was a kid channeling Maximo Oliveros. I don't know why I hated it but something about other people's judgment makes me caustic at the very least. And what makes it worse is that these insults are just everywhere. Hell, even the most educated fool harbors either fear or prejudice towards my brethren, er, sister-en.

There's just no running away from it.

So I started looking at the gay guy they're bashing. There's no magic mirrors for me, but it was an extremely purposeful process of looking at myself. Let me see: I like men and women as friends, but I prefer to get past friendships with men and escalate these to something better. I walk funny because I choose to, and I have enough finger-snapping attitude for two genders. I sashay to Madonna, snap my fingers to Destiny's Child, and subscribe to Regine's vocal range. I don't cross-dress, but, at the very least, white belts are a dangerous fashion statement. And I know that you don't wear orange blush if your complexion's totally evened-out. And that's factoring in the color of your asshole.

Hell, these stupid buttcracks DO have a point. That clearly wasn't some straight guy's personal evaluation. I am gay, and they're just stating the obvious. But that's a pretty stupid thing for an already stupid guy to do. You know, state the obvious. Might as well discuss the weather, or the time, or the calendar date.

Anyway...

Yes, I am gay and nothing's stopping that. The most other people can do is talk about it, but I've grown to understand that prejudice is merely a part of any homosexual's diet. So I learned to eat it and shit it and move on. There's no stopping it since these imbeciles are everywhere. There's no justifying my homosexuality because, like I mentioned, these idiots do have a valid argument. I'm gay and that's all there is to it.

But come to think of it, that's not a very bad thing. That gay thing. Not at all. First, I get to channel the best qualities of both sexes. I get to feel like a woman minus childbirth, stuffy pantyliners, and boobs. I get to keep my penis because of my genetic make up. And what naturally born male horndog, regardless of his sexual orientation, knows nothing of the satisfaction brought about by his "nota?"

Second, being gay gives me all the right to hang out with my equally gay or gayer friends, and what fool knows nothing about how funny a gay guy can get? I get to laugh more maybe because I'm surrounding myself with funnier people. It's either that or because I'm looking at the world in very pink glasses. That makes things all the whole lot funnier because for some reason, these pink glasses trigger some part of the brain which makes making fun (of other people?) a secondary nature.

Why in gay hell would I want to go against that?

It's just two things, but it's a whole heaven of fun already. I like it, and am growing to love it with the understanding that this is going to be my life. I know that there's more to it eventually, and I might blog about it in the long run.