Blog Soup #3?

All the filth that overfloweth from that stinking cup of piss known as ABS CBN has materialized into GEM TV. No, it doesn't have badly dressed singing champions. It doesn't feature noontime shows with anniversaries consummating in highly sensationalized massacres. It doesn't have totally unfunny comedians with bloated egos. What it does have, however, is this hour-long show called "Ang Nagsialis sa Dating Daan." I'm not sure if it airs for an hour, but it was all the time I needed to get sick.

I'm not sure about these guys, but bad publicity is still publicity. And I don't think broadcasting Eliseo Soriano's bank account number would help either. Alright, we get your point, he's going to hell because he swindles with the Bible and all that, but pulleaaase.

Brother Mike's already another human skidmark in the underwear of life. And what used to be his disciples are bashing him at channel 20 on weekdays at 5 in the afternoon.

Clearly, all this buzz in the NEWS about "suggestively erotic" notebook covers made available to kids in grade school is totally pointless. Why would any kid wank off to his Mathematics notebook when he can always abuse his parents' DSL connection? We'll just have to wait until these kids learn how to use Google. See, we all know for a fact that the Internet is made for porn.

Spaghetti. Call it that. Or pasta, if you will, but for the love of breastmilk, please stop referring to it as "spag." That sounds like something Andrew E would say.

How many MMDA officers does it take to blow a whistle? At least three blowing at the same time. You know how it is here in the Philippines, the louder the clearer. So that explains why I was seeing three MMDA officers terrorizing FX drivers with all that synchronized whistling. Fortunately, it was a one day show in front of the Galleria, and these drivers were able to breathe again the following day. Are these FX drivers that hard of hearing? It's either that, or we must have a whole lot of graduates from Traffic Control School.

I've never posted anything about that gay cowboy movie. I've never even watched the damned thing. True, Jake Gylenhaal and Heath Ledger enjoying each other's chocolate starfishes has got to be any gay guy's top masturbatory fantasy, but that's already another blogger's thesis statement. Not watching it doesn't make me any less gay anyway. Does that make you any less of a Christian if you were thirty years old and uncircumcised?

"I wish I know how to quit you?" Yeah, wave and say hi to the surgeon general and my cancer sticks.

Hey, allow me to greet you all a Happy Mother's Day in advance. My mom's not reading this blog, but she knows like the sweet angel she is that I'm extending the heartfelt shout out to her in California. Most of you folks might still have two parents. I only have one. And I don't think it matters anyway since my mother deserves twice the love.

Mama, I hope you never get tired of that Spice Girl song.

I used to say that lie down with dogs and then love your fleas. You are who your friends are, and that is exactly why I'm going to edit or re-write my blog roll. I've been doing a lot of hopping lately, and after getting a dose of healthy whiffs from different blogging influences, I' ve come to realize that I will need to retain, uhm, "certain" blogs.

Take a picture of me pimping some of my earlier posts:

What's a blog soup?
Triggering the Dirty Finger
A Finger to the Surgeon General
Ten Things
Things I Do With My Different Groups of Friends