Sunday, January 09, 2011
That Homo-bashing Little Devil
I was watering my plants, potted plants -- no metaphor there, and there was this group of kids playing Bring Me. Now, the purpose of that game, like most other games, is to win, and the first kid to deliver the officiating young bastard's request wins. They call him Emcee in those darling Jollibee kiddie parties. Bring me a wallet, bring me a one peso coin, bring me a venereal disease until she ran out of senseless things to request.
I was within earshot of these little motherfuckers, and she was fresh out of ideas. You can hear it in that suspended "Bring meeeeee...eee...eee... ano pa gusto niyo?" ("Bring meeeeee...eee...eee... what else do you want?") One of her friends, a little devil boy of around six, loudly whispered in her ear "a bakla (a faggot)."
It would otherwise have been funny if these kids were of legal age. Hell, kinky even, but no. I would have erupted in this fluent litany of foulmouthing if this little sonofabitch was 16. But he was around six, and I would not dare. That would have been immature. So I took out my hymn book of damaging prayers and wished he grow up gay. And he will be ugly, fat, and dumb, and he will be cocksucking on the providence of his parents until he's forty. Amen.
That being said, let's all define the word Fag Hag
They're basically these chicks who love the gays so much that the only thing that they don't have in common is a firstborn. Some of the most popular haggots are Marie Antoinette, Chelsea Handler, Grace Adler, Kris Aquino. And the reason why I'm saying this, in the dullest, uncharacteristic manner is because this is the best segue to the following post endorsements. Click!