Horror Movie Review #8: Feast

FEAST
Directed By: John Gulager
Release Date: September 22, 2006
Running Time: 92 minutes
Language: English
Horror Type: Monsters
Sex? - Not even breasts
Gore? - Totally
Momel's Rating: 4/5

Its one of those films where a group of strangers fortify some house while keeping zombies or vampires or monsters at bay. Remember those dudes in Dawn of the Dead and how they locked themselves up in this mall? How about "They're Coming to Get You" Barbara and her posse locked in some country house in Romero's Night of the Living Dead? That hotel in Tales From the Crypt's Demon Knight? This bed and breakfast in, well, Dead & Breakfast (I kid you not)? That cabin in 28 Weeks Later, at least in the first few scenes? That medieval fort in Army of Darkness? That walled city in Romero's Land of the Dead? It's a long list really, because it's one of the more effective, time tested, situations there is.

The feast takes place in this bar, The Bear Tavern, where this group of strangers, as singularly unique as the guys in CLUEDO, band together and lock themselves up against this family of bloodthirsty bad ass freak beasts. These killing machines are the Poor Man's Predator on account of the total cheapness, and altogether resourcefulness, that these puppets convey. Their heads are these elephantine skulls you'd usually see mounted, they have limbs akin to humans although blood stained, they're about 6 feet tall, they're mostly guttural with their squealing, and they are most definitely some of the most accomplished slashers there are. They're a taxidermists mutated nightmare equipped with a bad ass set of Ginsu Knives, and its up to our motley crew to survive these bloodthirsty freak beasts up to the morning after.

It's a bloodsoaked mess of splatter, dismemberment, gore, ocular trauma, and a little doggie style monster sex for comic relief. Feast delivers the freaky at an alarming pace, restrains the cheap fillers, and manages to remain entertaining all throughout. It's got that Tremor's feel to it, if that helps, a bit more macabre but in a fast paced environment however grimmer.