It can be argued that poetry, or any of them measured forms of expressions for that matter, is far more refined compared with the bullshit-susceptible essays that I favor. I don't do refined, and by the same token, I don't do poetry. I. Just. Don't. I suppose its the same default indifference that explains my aversion to clitorises. I can't do poems even if you bribed me, but I suppose I can hazard at attempt at gunpoint. And here's how it would look like
Zephyr, in the sky at night
You leave my mouth agape
With your carefree flight
And I wonder
Is this runny, salty warmth
That I taste on my lips
And on my tongue
Your droppings?
Even then, I feel so helpless, I had to refer to Madonna.
Personally, lyric measurement is a set of boobs and a pussy; it repels me and leaves a bad taste in my mouth. That bad taste in my mouth shit was figurative, of course. Sonnets, haikus, iambic hexameters, rhyming octaves... ah shit, just pass me that shotglass, light my cigarette and I'll be well on my happy way. No please, I'll pass on the rohypnol, thank you.
My free-flowing dipshit principles are claustrophobic; the restrictions of those ridiculous measurements will suffocate my ideas. I suppose I could write a poem, by and by, but my thoughts, and my enthusiasm, will then be deader than disco.
And besides, the only measurement that I do is with a 12-inch plastic ruler.
It goes without saying that I will not be joining this challenge. Meanwhile, there's this fistful of talents in that golden blogroll who are better equipped to grab this episode by the horns. I totally suck at poems; I can't even do bird shit right.
That being said, here's LitWit 4.6.
What's a sonnet, you ask?
A Sonnet isSooo... any ideas yet? Again, ladies and gentlemen, darling punks one and all, here are your instructions:
1. A verse form consisting of 14 lines with a fixed rhyme scheme.
2. A formally structured poem with 14 lines.
3. A lyric poem of fixed form: fourteen lines rhymed and organised according to several intricate schemes.
4. I'm sure glad I do essays and lists.
5. Amen to # 4.
Here are the instructions on registering:
1. Go to www.jessicarulestheuniverse.com
2. Click on the title of the latest LitWit Challenge. It's 4.6: Write Us a Sonnet this time around.
3. Click on the LOGGED IN link. It is directly below the Leave a Reply line.
4. You will then be prompted to login with a Wordpress username and password. Nope, don't cry yet. There is a link that says Register. This is directly below the check box for Remember Me.
5. Follow the bouncing ball. It's tiring to enumerate the following instructions on account of they are mostly self-explanatory. And besides, hindi ka chicks. Malaki ka na.
momelia! :D
ReplyDeletemy words fail me at the moment, my friend.
i can't think of anything else to write.
So I pray someone will do in my stead,
With sense and humor that can ease my plight.
hahaha!! kadiring sonnet bakla! :))amishu!
Wickedmoonlight -- Thanks for trying, though. I take it you can't handle the measure? Aha, we're on the same boat, anyway, which is why I'm appealing to those talented punks at my roll. At least try something, will you please?
ReplyDeleteAnd to my darling punks who just updated:
I got drunk with the EX; I can't scour and do my blog rounds now. I promise to grace your holes as soon as the poor man's vodka dissipates from my circulation.
This post was prepared ahead of time. That explains why I was able to publish in spite of the many levels of fucken drunkenness.
Cheers Wickedmoonlight! Mabuhay Ka! Muahness from Pasig Citehh!
hahaha! wickedmoonlight aka uge! ako to, si uge! :)) ahmishu freydi!! mwahhh!
ReplyDeleteI had to pass too. Maybe the J-Zaf got tired... some entries in the last Litwit do sound tired and pretentious and just... sad. I'm not referring to you though. Your writing is like a breathe of fresh air... odd coz you refer to your blog as bullshit.
ReplyDeleteI was watching Howl the other night and I was thinking about at least trying to compose a poem. I never tried, because I fail at poetry. I do better when I express myself as blatantly as I can.
ReplyDeleteI never even tried to get near my notebook to type. I knew I couldn't do it. I'm an essay gay guy. I'm fine with it.
I swear if you did not say that the 'bad taste in your mouth' was figurative I would've thought that you tried boobs and pussy. *pukes*
and i was hoping to take a shot at the next litwit. haha. but aw, i don't do poetry either. i'll have to wait for the next one. how often does it happen anyway?
ReplyDeleteMomel! I've missed you! Haha. Yeah, I'm not even going to think about this one, cuz I can't write poetry for shit...
ReplyDeleteWaitaminute, you went drinking with an ex? Please blog about that next. Please?
I love hearing stories about the inebriated and the maudlin.
Hope you're well! =)
(what is the 'poor man's vodka'?)
watch nalang ang star. mahina ako sa arts and letters. good luck sa mga sasama. pero maganda ang prize. parehong di ko pa nababasa. wala bang Ms. LitWit Challenge? may gown na akes.
ReplyDeletebryan stars
Lovely darling punks you all!
ReplyDeleteWickedmoonlight -- Ahaha, ikaw pala yan Uge! Akala ko naman kung sinong female wrestler! Amishu too fren! How's the photography business doing? Kunan niyo naman ako ng daring na stolen shots, please?
Glentot -- You could say that, and then some. That probably explains the variation on this challenge. You are so pulling my long legged legs now with that fresh air bit! It would have been closer to home if you employed some other flatulent simile; that would have been darling! Ahaha, thanks though. That's a choking mouthful coming from someone of your writing quality. Oha!
Vajayjay -- Essay gay guy is so right on the anus. And I wonder why that is? Maybe its an asshole thing, noh?
I once wrote about seeing a transgendered man's pussy, and I still retch at the memory.
Nishigirl -- It's a weekly thing, as far as I remember, and a submission will do you well. Her feedback's a writing currency, and it will make you profitable, by and by. I have resolved to endorse her LitWit challenges because I'm confident in the writing mettle of you punks in my roll.
Sitting Pretty -- You're one of my best candidates for these challenges. I have equal confidence in all your eloquences, but there's this kindred spirit in your writing that reinforces my peace of mind. Yes, I got shitfaced with the ex. It was yesterday. I suppose I could write about it, but I have elected to reinforce this interval on such emotional wrecks. It makes me far less sexy, and my long legs won't help my cause none.
I am well, thank you. Ahaha, it's The Bar. Anything you purchase in this third world hole justifies the "poor man" phrase. For example, that devilishly fun Gran Matador is the poor man's brandy.
Cheers Wickedmoonlight, Glentot, Vajarl, Nishiboy, and Sitting PRetty! Mabuhay Kayo! Muahness from Pasig Citehh!
Ahaha!
ReplyDeleteAmigang Bry -- Ms LitWit Challenge! I love that! I should suggest that sometime, and I will credit you in the process. Those challenges can use a little more variation.
Cheers Bry! Muahness from Pasig Citehh!
"Your writing is like a breathe of fresh air..." ahahaha I can't believe the kind of mistakes I make!!! Nakakahiya sa English teacher ko...
ReplyDeleteKhie nagbasa ako nong mga post mo na di ko nabasa..kainis naman kasi ang wordpress at walang update ng new post,huhuhuhu
ReplyDeleteAy sus..sure na sure..pass ko at kung wala akong alam sa essay eh lalo na sa tula..sa tulo meron,hihihi
miss you khie!!
Hindi din ako magaling tumula. Tumuwad, mas bet ko. Bwahahaha. Anyway, I've never joined LitWit. Feeling ko kasi hindi ko keri ang lebel ng mga taong sumasali. Saka, nabasa ko na rin kasi pareho yung prizes. Hihi. Excuses, excuses, I know. Maybe I'll try sometime in the future. Cheers! :D
ReplyDeleteGlentot -- Tayo tayo lang naman, kaya gow lang ng gow! Ang totoo niyan eh di ko rin napansin eh. Wahaha! Ay teka, may follow up comment pa pala ko sa post mo.
ReplyDeletePowkie -- Ang mahalaga eh tumambay ka rito diba? Yun lang eh watir na ang pechay ko. Ay naku himhay, love na love ko yung huling post mo ha. Palung palo and everything, the sweetest song that I can sing oh baby!
Mishu Himhay!
Siratalaga -- Aba, iba ang nagagawa sa yo ng may jowa, fren. I never imagined you to be as loose with your explicit tagalog, and I like it! I was really hoping that you'd submit something; your writing has that certain intangible spit that I am similarly possessed of.
Cheers Glentot, Himhay, and Siratalaga! Mabuhay Kayo! Muahness from Pasig Citehh!
I know what you are, Momel. You're my fairy blog mother. The one who believes in me. My blog benefactress. Hehe.
ReplyDeleteHey, The Bar isn't that bad...Well, okay, yeah it is THAT bad. It's like the ethanol they use in medical labs to fixate specimens.
I actually read your old post about the post-SRS vagina. Haha. And all the ciggies you had to smoke while writing, just thinking about it. I didn't know female genitalia could spark such repulsion. hahaha.
P.S. You must help me think of a catchy signature like your "Muahness from Pasig Citehh" I can't think of anything good. =)
Lot's of Love from Cebu? How banal.
HAHAHA. Pareho tayo. I can't do sonnets or anything measured. Kumusta naman angg creative juice mo nun?=)
ReplyDeletehey momel,
ReplyDeletethanks for always dropping by and making me LOL :D
and and big thanks for inviting me to ms zafra's sonnet writing contest.
i did write something quick at the train. although i think i have missed the deadline if philippine time is to be followed. lol
cheers!
\m/
Not a poet, and not into poetry either. I can't do anything that rhymes. ahahaha!
ReplyDeleteAnd the aversion to clits, boobs and pussies...why am I not surprised? hahahaha!
Good luck to your followers who will join the latest LitWit challenge. May the force be with them. :-)
Why hello!
ReplyDeleteSitting Pretty -- Ahaha, fairy blog mother. I like that. Your fairy blog mother is a punk nerd afflicted with this sick inclination to bitch fit. How's that? Oh yeah, repulsion is so right on the crack. I should think of good thoughts now that you mentioned that. And I wish I could suggest a catcy signature phrase, but that was spontaneously inspired, and there's no re-creating an epiphany. I will keep that in mind though, and I will keep you posted.
Tsina -- Exactly. I don't mind that my essays are often verbose, but it gives me the freedom to rant to my heart's content.
Bulitz -- Wow! So were you able to submit? Which one were you? Aw sweet heaven, this is such a darling!
Kaye -- I know! But I will keep endorsing those challenges all the same. But I will spare her recent one the same courtesy. Read Tolstoy. Definitely for nerd to the core bookworms who will have no problems with commitments.
Cheers Sitting Pretty, Tsina, Bulitz, and Kaye! Mabuhay Kayo! Muahness from Pasig Citehh!