Friday, July 26, 2013

This is Why I Hate Your Second "I'm Bored" Facebook Status

**Maybe I get it the first time. Just the first time. Juuuuust the first time, and we'll leave it at that. What?! What do you mean it doesn't stop there? Oh hell no.

Sooo... why do we have to know that you're bored? Again? Okay, so you ran out of things to do... What the hell do we care? It's in your Facebook wall. It's a goddamn Facebook status. Do you expect us to Like that you're bored? You just told us that you're fresh out of ideas with which to entertain yourself. How stupid is that when this world wide web, underscore world wide, is near-limitless with devilish amusement. What? You can't be resourceful enough to distract yourself? 

You think the internet has run out of porn? So why the hell are you still online, anyway? You can't get a real life that you'd rather stay online and remain helpless? What the hell's wrong with you that you're letting us know, on the internet, of all places, that you've got nothing to do? Is there anything more to you than you're "I'm bored" status updates? Really?

"I'm bored." Personally, this two-word status translates to another two-word equivalent: "Conceited imbecile." I think it's conceited whenever any status update follows the "Me, Me, Me" Train of Thought. "Me, Me, Me." "I'm, I'm I'm." "Ako, Ako, Ako." "Fuck you, Fuck you, Fuck you." However, it is Your wall, Your profile, Your Ego Gym, Your boring, uneventful, wallflower life. It's all about you, so feel free to overflow/saturate/strangle your Facebook wall with all the narcissism in your shallow, self-important being. I don't give a fuck. Meanwhile, it irritates me to see that your stupid narcissism is overflowing/saturating/strangling My news feed. I will be unfriending you soon. 

I have long abandoned the idea of Quality Status Updates (haha) because of conceited imbeciles like you. Surely, we are all given to such bouts of self-entitlement, from time to time. The need to be acknowledged is but a naturally human thing. However, your dependency for ego-rubbing Likes and Comments and Shares is alarming in it's frequency! Why do we have to know that you're bored again?


  1. My cousin who is also on FB is worse. She keeps posting "selfies" with captions like "Ang pangit ko talaga huhuhu". What's more stupid than that? The 459 comments on that picture saying "Ang ganda mo nga eh." Some people should not be allowed anywhere near the Internet.

    1. Haha, should you elaborate on this on a further post, Andoy, or should I go ahead and steam this idea until it's nothing but vapor? I am getting some ideas now, but I suppose you'll translate it better!

      Uyyy, may news ako sa yo tungkol dun sa request mo. FB ko na lang, haha.

  2. You make sense... as always... Like you, I usually get annoyed with those people...

    But let's admit it, baka ganun din sila sa 'tin... Hmmnnnn...

    Wait, kuha lang ako ng tisyu ah... Dumugo na naman ilong ko sa post mo eh! lol

    1. Thank you, Senyor Iskwater, for the compliment, I think. I mean, I think it's a compliment, coming from you. I have read your blog, and maybe I can tell that you mean certain things. So, thanks. But you can be sarcastic too, sooo I'll leave it at that.

      Ay, ako naman ay bihirang mag status sa FB. Pag minsan kailangan lang. Once every two three days, minsan eh bihira pa. Fridays, shoot yan, lalo sa updates. Pero bihira. And I never, ever, toxify my friends' feeds with the words "I'm bored." Never. They could be hating me for something else, but never this.

      Yes, nag-explain talaga ako, required yan, lalo pa't I always, always, walk the talk.

      Uy, I'm sorry it took some time, pero ni-add na kita sa roll ko, and thank you thank you for dropping by!

  3. This doesn't bother me as much as seeing fifteen thousand selfies in a day because I can easily skip their one liner status updates and photos take larger space on my feed. I have this one Facebook friend who posts selfies every other I swear I want to punch her in the vagina. She's not even remotely pretty oh my gahd.

    "Going to church" selfie. Who the fuck cares and how the fuck does your face have anything to do with you going to church you ugly bitch.

    1. Haha, that last line is downright darling in it's brevity. Three snaps in a goddamn z-formation to you, Vajayjay!

      I will be writing about Selfies next. And I will be mentioning that quote, and you will be receiving full credit, faggot. Muahness from Pasig Cirehhh!

  4. There's a world of difference between seeking acknowledgement, and downright conceit. The former is specific, and is targeted towards an intended audience, like a writer seeking another writer's approval; the latter is pure self-entitlement, the audience being irrelevant, merely a means, so long as they provide the intended end - attention.

    1. "Surely, we are all given to such bouts of self-entitlement, from time to time. The need to be acknowledged is but a naturally human thing. However, your dependency for ego-rubbing Likes and Comments and Shares is alarming in it's frequency! Why do we have to know that you're bored again?"

      Underscore "dependency."

      Muahness Red from Pasig Cirehhh!

  5. Unless you are a fan of all those food posts, I'd say they annoy the hell out of me, too. but then, what do I care if you like them and I don't? hahahaha! joke lang. I can tolerate kasi a certain level of food photos paminsan minsan, but when my newsfeed is assaulted by those photos tas all of them pa madilaw because of the Instagram filters, ay nako. I hide their status updates from my newsfeed. I don't necessarily unfriend them. A lot of them would bitch about being unfriended anyway as if their very lives depended on whether or not you were friends (but then the act of unfriending is already an indication of your standing in somebody else's life, di ba?)

    And those I'm bored and stuff like that posts are only ok for teenagers because that's understandable. they haven't reached the maturity that sensible status updates call for. Again, if I find that they annoy me, I hide their updates from my newsfeed. Add to this those updates that feel as if they were waging a war against someone. Funny thing is, they are the same people who aren't afraid to say whatever shit is on their minds and then bitch when people tell them off for whatever rubbish that came off their puny little minds.

    So anyway, if you feel you are getting annoyed by my posts, feel free to hide my status updates but please don't unfriend me. ahahahahahha!



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