Other People's Love Stories #4: Excerpts from a Blowjob

**There is no way to embellish this retelling any further, so I won't.

He holds my right hand, wraps my fingers in between his, moves them closer to his face, and then he starts planting slow kisses. This little boy of 22 has the softest lips, and those little boy kisses are a darling surprise. His breathing tickles the gap in between my fingers, how pleasurable, and I continue sucking on his little boy dick with renewed enthusiasm. To say the least, I was rather surprised at the gesture. And so I rallied on, undeterred, for I have an ejaculating mission to continue.

I was horny, you know, and I think I was doing a straight-up, bang up job. You seem I don't recall any of my boys kissing my hand while I was giving them head.

Fellatio has never been this romantic. I have decided to give this sweetheart such a violent orgasm that he'll be sucking his food for three days.

Other People's Love Stories #3: Twice His Age

**Or Other People's Weirdness: Twice His Age

My tattoos figure largely in this story.

We've been friends for a while now, but she still refers to me as "Uy, ano!" That's "Hey you!" in receipt language. Anyway, Norma, that's my friend, Norma cooks the best torta within miles, and that's why I'm keeping her business. And I decided to eat at her stall that afternoon on account of I was too lazy to do them goddamn dishes afterwards. 

So there I was, all 5 foot 9 inches of pure fierceness with nothing but a tanktop, a short pair of brown floral shorts, and an umbrella at around ten in the morning in all this third world heat, standing before this selection of warm lunch. "Hey you!" I can see it on her teeth. Norma, that's my friend, was happy to see me. And she was with this giggling old stranger that was, by comparison, happier to see me. 

Life without Norma's torta was far from satisfying, but I had to make do with her current menu. And I have to choose with marked haste on account of Norma's other friend, the giggling old stranger, was standing next to me now. And she's moving her wrinkled hands up and down my right sleeve of tattoos. That smile never left her face. 

I hurried with my quailed egg ground beef something and a cup of rice, of course, to the closest table. Norma's friend, and that smile, sat across me, directly before me, where she decided that I can use her cheerful company. It turns out my tattoos remind me of her Facebook friend with which she shares a secret relationship with, and they've been flirting on and off four four months now, and that she's... 

"You're telling me you have a boyfriend in Facebook?"

Her forefinger stretched an inch before her puckered lips told me to keep it a secret. She says her boyfriend was "high profile," which prompts the secrecy. Shhh. I told her I will be 36 this August because she asked. And then she told me, with a wider smile, that her boyfriend is younger than I am. He's 28. And I'm nearly done with lunch. 

"You're telling me that your Facebook boyfriend is 28?"

She giggled hard and then shushed me immediately with that pointed forefinger before her puckered lips. 

"You tell me," said that look on Norma's face. 

I was paying for my lunch when I heard Norma's friend mention "when a guy likes a girl, then he should visit her," and "passports," and "travel to the Philippines," and I smiled at the three of them goodbye.

Let me make a wild guess and report that she's about 60 at the very least. She was around five feet flat, and her hair's the triumph of white over gray. Her eyes have seen decades, and her crow's feet have crow's feet. She's this ball of senile energy, and if it wasn't for her vibrance, then my money's on 62. What I do know, from the stories that issued between those jagged teeth, is that her boyfriend's 28. She has a mouthful of yellow teeth that were distributed in two disorderly rows. It reminds me of a Chinese colony without religion. And I cannot make any of this up, because if I did, it will be between a younger dude, probably a minor, and a balding horndog with a beauty parlor. 

Other People's Love Stories #2: The Aging Crossdresser and the Fuccboi

**The first truth is that theirs is a love story where no love happens. The second truth is that what they have is not even a story. They have a non-story. They have a no-love non-story, but they think they're, or at least one of them thinks they're in love. And he knows it's not mutual. 

What is pedersaty then is still pederasty now.

Fuccboi is visibly bored, and he doesn't care if it shows, and he doesn't like the vibe of Aging Crossdresser's ancient presence. Aging Crossdresser, on the other hand, decides to blind eye his boy toy's usual misbehavior, however, and he continues wooing the apple of his eye, and Fuccboi too, with cheap brandy and Horny Horny Pink on his lips. Someone asks for coins to buy ice with, and he hands him a fifty. 

Fuccboi lives in the Smaller Intestines of this Pig called Metro Manila. Aging Crossdresser's beauty parlor is in the same tract, although it is closer to the Larger Intestine. He is more than twice Fuccboi's age. As a matter of fact, he is four months away from being thrice Fuccboi's age, which is 16. Theirs is an affair that operates on the usual quid pro quo in these kinds of relationships: money for sex with the genuine loyalty of a fake love affair. 

They both lead utterly boring lives. He is on his third attempt at finishing second year high school, while he owns a trying hard beauty parlor and a Nokia phone with mostly under age boys in his address book. And let me tell you that about 80% of these boys are on his payroll. The remaining 20% are uncircumcised, but he keeps them just the same in spite of his loathing for the taste of cock cheese. A free hair cut is how they met. This is how our Aging Crossdresser addresses the grooming needs, among others, of the growing numbers of Fuccbois in the Smaller Intestines. 

Now he's drinking cheap brandy with Fuccboi and Fuccboi's other Fuccboi friends, and he's already texting Fuccboi's replacement with the usual lust in his wrinkled fingers. Fuccboi decides to blind eye his aging benefactor's misbehavior, however, and he continues to flirt with some Fuccgirl on the smartphone he received on Aging Crossdresser's second monthsary. 

Other People's Love Stories #1: Courtship Smells Like Rose Water

There is no metaphor to my spacing of the letters. I think it's cute. 

I   s o m e t i m e s   i m a g i n e   t h a t   I   a m   j e a l o u s   o f  p e o p l e   i n   t h e   
e a r l y   s t a g e s   o f   t e n d e r   c o u r t s h i p .   I   s e e   t h e m   a n d   t h e i r   
i n f a t u a t e d   g l a n c e s ,   a n d   I   h e a r   t h e m   a n d   t h e i r  p u b l i c  
p i l l o w   t a l k ,   a n d   I   s m e l l   h e r   s p e c i a l   p e r f u m e   t h a t   s h e   
r e s e r v e s   o n l y   f o r   h i s   v i s i t a t i o n s ,   a n d   I   w o r r y   t h a t   s h e ' s   
r u n n i n g   o u t   o f   i t   b e c a u s e   h e ' s   s e e i n g   h e r   e v e r y   d a y n o w . 

It smells like rose water. 

I   n o t i c e   t h a t   s h e ' s   t a k i n g   m o r e   t i m e   t o   p o w d e r   h e r   n o s e   
a n d   d o   h e r   l a s h e s   a n d   h e r   b r o w s .   H e   s a y s   h e r   m o r n i n g   
f a c e   i s   j u s t   a s   a d o r a b l e   r e g a r d l e s s ,   a n d   I   s m i l e   i n   s e c r e t b e c a u s e   h e r   e x c e e d i n g l y   t h i n   b r o w s   r e m i n d   m e   o f   W h o o p i G o l d b e r g .   H e   a d o r e s   h e r .   

S h e   d e n i e s   t h e   a d o r a t i o n   i s   m u t u a l ,   a n d   I   a m   n o t   b u y i n g   
i t .   I   d o   n o t   r u m m a g e ,   b u t   I   h a l f   e x p e c t   h e r   t o   r e p l e n i s h   
h e r   v a n i t y   k i t   a n d   t h a t   G o d   d a m n e d   b o t t l e   o f   p e r f u m e   a n y t i m e   n o w .   

T h e i r s   i s   a   c o u r t s h i p   t h a t   s p r i n t e d   l i k e   t h e   u n d e a d   i n   
Z o m b i e   L a n d .   I t   w a s   m I n d l e s s   a n d   h e e d l e s s   a n d ,   l i k e   h o w z o m b i e s   h a p p e n ,   i s   l a r g e l y   u n e x p l a i n e d .   A n d   i t   i s   j u s t   a s m i l d l y   e n t e r t a i n i n g   t o   w a t c h ,   m o s t l y   b e c a u s e   o f   t h e   
s u d d e n   p a r o x y s m s   o f   c h e e s y   t h a t   w e   e x p e c t   o f   t h e s e   f r e e s h o w s .   

A n d   t h e n   I   r e m e m b e r   t h a t   I   h a v e   r e a c h e d   t h a t   a g e   w h e r e , a s   f a r   a s   r e l a t i o n s h i p s   g o ,   I   a m   m o r e   c a r e f u l   t h a n   I   a m   h o p e f u l .   S o   I   h a v e   e l e c t e d   t o   b e   h a p p y   f o r   t h e m ,   i n s t e a d .